Step in for the trip of a lifetime!, or: who needs LSD when you have a Crazy Character Meme?

[fpb]

Crazy Character Meme results. Last year I tried to fit stories to the outlines; this time I shall let them stand in glorious isolation - with extra congratulations to rfachir for pumping in lunacy above and beyond the call of duty.

1 John Constantine
2 Sue Storm
3 Rupert Giles
4 Severus Snape
5 Gimli the Dwarf
6 Han Solo
7 C3P0
8 The Red Skull
9 Hagrid
10 The Batman
11 Professor Charles Xavier
12 Uncle Scrooge McDuck
13 Alastor Moody
14 Jeeves
15 Bellatrix Black Lestrange


TheSwordmaiden:
Jeeves schemes to take over the world. He/she is in competition with Hagrid and Uncle Scrooge McDuck. Meanwhile, Sue Storm and Rupert Giles Characters attempt to thwart their evil plans, and The Red Skull may be a double agent.

Cheyinka:
Han Solo and Severus Snape find themselves accused of a crime that they didn't commit (either alone or singly). Do they ask Hagrid or Professor Charles Xavier to help them?

Rupert Giles, Gimli the Dwarf Gimli, and C3P07 go to see a concert or a play or something of that sort. What do they go see and whose idea was it?

Rfachir:
John Constantine, Sue Storm and Rupert Giles all work at an office. John Constantine and Sue Storm are best friends. Severus Snape is John Constantine's sibling, and is getting married to a very boring Gimli the Dwarf on Saturday. Snape and Gimli very budget conscious and not party people and their party promises to be a great bore. John Constantine is depressed about standing up with Severus Snape and decides to wear the nicest party clothes to work to cheer up a little before the knots finally get tied. Sue Storm decides that John Constantine would look lovely with a makeover, and they spend the afternoon getting beautiful. Rupert Giles spies John Constantine coming back to the office and falls head over heals in love with John Constantine (even though Sue Storm is prettier).

John Constantine can't believe the luck. Rupert Giles is the most exciting creature John Constantine ever met. Beautiful, adventurous, ambitious. John Constantine reciprocates the love and shortly gets into a parental situation, and John Constantine and Rupert Giles get married.

Sue Storm is a little put out, but is just as ambitious as Rupert Giles and turns into a successful businessperson. Severus Snape and Gimli think Sue Storm is wasting their life on business. Han Solo, John Constantine and Severus Snape's parent, doesn't much approve of Sue Storm, but keeps an eye on them and nags them to get married, even though Sue Storm isn't exactly unfulfilled as a (slightly) swinging single. Han Solo babysits for the child,Professor Xavier.

Rupert Giles meets a rich patron, C3P0. C3P0 cheats on The Red Skull, the spouse, and needs Rupert Giles to cover for the dalliances. While Rupert Giles and C3P0 grow closer, Hagrid, the one C3P0 is cheating with, offers John Constantine a job. John Constantine knows both about Hagrid and The Red Skull. The Red Skull knows about Hagrid, but goes to great lengths to keep C3P0 from knowing that The Red Skull knows. Eventually, Rupert Giles meets a paramour while covering for C3P0. That paramour, The Batman, is the reincarnation of the last Vestal priestess, who was having an affair with a pagan priest, Professor Xavier, back around 390 AD. Professor Xavier was reincarnated, too, and is now the subject of a paranormal researcher in this century. The Batman is an archeologist, and still feels an unexplained passion for Professor Xavier, even though Professor Xavier doesn't recognize The Batman, since Professor Xavier is a toddler.

Uncle Scrooge McDuck is head of a mysterious group, like the Masons, who is charged with keeping the secret key to reincarnation (like the albino priest). (Uncle Scrooge McDuck is not an albino priest.) Alastor Moody is the foreign investigator who must hunt down Uncle Scrooge McDuck before another murder to protect the secret of reincarnation is committed. Jeeves is the victim that Uncle Scrooge McDuck killed to get Alastor Moody's attention - Jeeves is Alastor Moody's brother, who was building a bridge over the river Kwai for prison commander Bellatrix. 16 is the doctor who comes in after the bridge blows up, running his hands through his hair and muttering, "Madness, Madness."

EDITOR’S NOTE: which figures, since there is no 16.

Comments

[theswordmaiden.livejournal.com]

Yes! These would make great crossover stories.

One of the best is the idea of Threepio being a rich patron.

[rfachir.livejournal.com]

Scary - Scrooge McDuck has always carried that albino priest vibe. I must be psychic. And everyone knows Jeeves is Alastor Moody's secret brother. It's practically canon.

[cheyinka]

Well, now I'm curious about what kind of concert or play or movie that Rupert Giles, Gimli, and C3P0 would go see together.

[rfachir.livejournal.com]

Pink Floyd, of course. "It's a sin that somehow, Light is changing to Shadow, and casting a shrowd over all we have known..."

[fpb.livejournal.com]

And that ties up with my comment about LSD. It would be Giles who would choose the music - he is a popular music expert. And BTW, your proposed marriage for Gimli is not necessarily impossible. There is no reason why Gimli should not be female: according to Tolkien, there is very little physical difference between male and female Dwarves, so that outsiders might not be able to tell the difference. However, this would make his famous love for Galadriel a lesbian passion, which I am sure Tolkien did not intend. 8-)

[fpb.livejournal.com]

The scariest thing is the idea of Jeeves setting out to take over the world. Because everyone knows that whatever Jeeves sets out to do, he does.

[fpb.livejournal.com]

I double dare you to write them. At least one or two.