To be honest, I knew from my youth that if I didn't have one, I'd never grow up. That I'd never truly be tempered by anything difficult... that the only hard situation I could create in my life by choice (rather than have it visited on me by circumstance) was to have a family and task myself with taking care of it. And that would be my crucible.
I was right.
I would not say that everyone should undertake this thus; you have to be willing to let it shape you and not resent it for changing you for it to have this benefit. But it is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, and yes, it is changing me just as I had thought. The duty is more difficult than I had imagined in my wildest extrapolations... but the joys are vaster, and completely unanticipated. :)
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Date: 2008-06-21 01:30 pm (UTC)I was right.
I would not say that everyone should undertake this thus; you have to be willing to let it shape you and not resent it for changing you for it to have this benefit. But it is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, and yes, it is changing me just as I had thought. The duty is more difficult than I had imagined in my wildest extrapolations... but the joys are vaster, and completely unanticipated. :)