Where have I been?

[fpb]

Hello. I have been having a sickening time with my computer. It started when I downloaded some free compression software (called IZarc - avoid it like the plague, kids) that had a murderous effect on the rest of my software. The first visible effect was that it converted all zip and other archive files into IZarc files, but it also kept on causing software errors all over the place. I deleted it and eventually found a better option, but in the meanwhile the rest of my software had got hurt, and one fine day I found that I could no longer go online. I tried to remedy this by deleting and reinstalling Internet Explorer - next thing I knew, the machine would not boot up at all. I had it seen to by a professional, which I could ill afford, and the result was that the system was restored - but half the software I had, including the important Nero system for burning ROMs, was somehow deleted. Worse still, the IE still would not work: in the most frustrating way imaginable, it reached up to the point where it actually opened a window for internet pages - and stopped half way through, crashing the computer.

The end of the story is that I had to take out of mothballs a ten-year-old Compaq with a wholly inadequate RAM (64kb), HD (2.1G) and screen, but which at least had uncorrupted software; and I will have to go on using it until I have saved enough money to have my Toshiba repaired or buy a new one. So this is the reason why you have not been hearing from me lately. I hope it is a good enough excuse.

And Happy Easter, everyone.

Comments

[curia-regis.livejournal.com]

Oh! I'm glad you're back and okay! :) privatemaladict and I were wondering where you were.

Computer viruses suck.

[privatemaladict.livejournal.com]

Hey, he's alive! :)

Wow, sounds like quite a trip. Computers can be downright evil. There's a wonderful footnote in Neil Gaiman's Good Omens on the subject - might try to find it.

Hope you get your good computer fixed. That's quite a nuisance.

[privatemaladict.livejournal.com]

Here's the quote:

Along with the standard computer warranty agreement which said that if the machine 1) didn't work, 2) didn't do what the expensive advertisement said, 3) electrocuted the immediate neighbourhood, 4) and in fact failed entirely to be inside the expensive box when you opened it, this was expressly, absolutely, implicitly and in no event the fault or responsibility of the manufacturer, that the purchaser should consider himself lucky to be allowed to give his money to the manufacturer, and that any attempt to treat what had just been paid for as the purchaser's own property would result in the attentions of serious men with menacing briefcases and very thin watches.

And the footnote...

Crowley had been extremely impressed with the warranties offered by the computer industry, and had in fact sent a bundle Below to the department that drew up the Immortal Soul agreements, with a yellow memo form attached just saying: "Learn, guys."

-- Crowley is a demon, in case you don't know (Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman, Good Omens)

[becomethesea.livejournal.com]

YaY! More updates from teh FPB!!!!

w00T!!!

[tashmania.livejournal.com]

It's things like this that make me think that computers are the work of Satan. *nod* Anyway glad to see you back, I'd been wondering where you'd got to!

[fpb.livejournal.com]

Thanks, everyone. Especially thanks to PM for giving me a good laugh after some of the most miserable and nerve-shredding days of my life. It's nice to have friends.

[privatemaladict.livejournal.com]

You're welcome. I'm glad it cheered you up, and I'm glad you're back and OK. I was starting to wonder. :)

[rfachir.livejournal.com]

Welcome back - missed you very much

[falco-conlon.livejournal.com]

it's good to have you back though!

[webbapettigrew.livejournal.com]

Boo to crappy computers!

[fpb.livejournal.com]

Actually, to be fair, it's not the computer, it's the crappy freeware that did all the damage. At worst, you might perhaps blame Microsoft for being vulnerable, but the guy I blame is whoever designed IZarc. If we ever meet, my boots and his/her backside are going to have a long, long talk.

[jennilee.livejournal.com]

Well, I see you had a fun time. :P

Glad you're back - I've actually been gone for a bit too.

[chthonya]

I was away from LJ for a couple of weeks, so I'd only clocked your absense a few days ago. Glad to see my worries were unfounded!

Welcome back - and Happy Easter! :)

[privatemaladict.livejournal.com]

*Points to fpb's next post*

Well, I see you're back and kicking. *grins*

[goreism.livejournal.com]

A blessed Easter! Christos anesti! :-)

Ours isn't for some weeks yet.