ghastly xmas songs meme

[fpb]

Having come back from shopping with a strong feeling that Xmas muzak ought to be made a crime, I want to get a little of my own back. Hence I invite all my friends and readers to mention the worst song they can think of - one or many, as many as you like - and a description of what the sentence on the criminals who wrote and/or performed it should be. Then copy this meme and post it on your own LJ.

I'll start:
Santa baby. Its authors and everyone who is so base of soul as to perform it should be forced to wear titanium steel chastity belts for the rest of their natural lives.
Wonderful Christmas time. Sir Paul McCartney should be forbidden from ever publishing any song again until, in the opinion of a jury of 200 music lovers chosen at random, he has produced at least two songs of the quality of Hey Jude or Fool on the Hill.

Comments

[rosedemon.livejournal.com]

I don't know, I always thought Santa Baby was pretty clever. The Golddigger trying to score with the man who has all the best presents makes me laugh. As if Santa wouldn't all ready know she had been bad all year.

Personally, The 12 Days of Christmas works on me. A bit too long and far too repetitive. I think I am more offended when advertisers warp a good song to fit their hard sell package. There is a GPS system that is currently using Carol of the Bells to hawk their wares and it bothers me to no end. I adore the song and hate to have it used in this manner.

[fpb.livejournal.com]

I don't agree with you at all, I'm afraid. As far as I can see, there is nothing ironical about that slutty song. And since ambient muzak is inevitable - would it were otherwise - it might as well be decent rather than repulsive. I would always use good music for background.

[rosedemon.livejournal.com]

The song was written for Eartha Kitt and basically styled for her voice. She is, to this day, the only one that was able to capture the tongue-in-cheek meaning in the lyrics. I would agree with you that the song is rather slutty but only by the standards of who has sung the song since. None have been able to repeat what Kitt managed to do and sadly her version is the least played these days.

As far as good music for the background...it is in the ears of the beholder. At this time of the year I could do with a little less of Sir Paul's attempt at forced Christmas cheer and want to avoid It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year renditions. They smack me as song writers who had to write something cheerful and so holiday happy in June or July in order to make the December pressing. At the same time I am astounded at the fact that many lists of the worst holiday songs also include The Little Drummer Boy and O Holy Night. I suppose it up to whoever is making up the list.

[fpb.livejournal.com]

It is. I agree that The Little Drummer Boy and O Holy Night are among the good ones, even though the former belongs to a category I find dubious - building up extra material outside the gospel narrative. But you may have noticed that I would like Sir Paul to be condemned not to publish any more songs until, according to impartial judges, he has come up with at least two of Beatle level. I find what has happened to his genius since at least Ebony and Ivory deeply depressing.

[rosedemon.livejournal.com]

They could take his Sir-hood away from him until he finds his creative groove again. Give it to Ringo, at least he has never strayed from the forms that made him famous. Paul can have it back after he writes another "Revolver" style album.

[fpb.livejournal.com]

So... who'll tell the Queen?

[rosedemon.livejournal.com]

Harry can do it. He's in trouble all the time anyway.