ghastly xmas songs meme

[fpb]

Having come back from shopping with a strong feeling that Xmas muzak ought to be made a crime, I want to get a little of my own back. Hence I invite all my friends and readers to mention the worst song they can think of - one or many, as many as you like - and a description of what the sentence on the criminals who wrote and/or performed it should be. Then copy this meme and post it on your own LJ.

I'll start:
Santa baby. Its authors and everyone who is so base of soul as to perform it should be forced to wear titanium steel chastity belts for the rest of their natural lives.
Wonderful Christmas time. Sir Paul McCartney should be forbidden from ever publishing any song again until, in the opinion of a jury of 200 music lovers chosen at random, he has produced at least two songs of the quality of Hey Jude or Fool on the Hill.

Comments

[rfachir.livejournal.com]

Eat more Sugarplums, you silly Scrooges! Santa Baby is older than all of us - over half a century. Grandma has been drinking too much eggnog for 30 years. Tchaikovsky's ballet became as ubiquitous as Chocolate Santas in the 50's, when Santa Baby was first a hit.
Classics get that way because they work. There *are* people more focused on getting than giving, and drinking themselves happy (and other people miserable). Yet we STILL expect the best from everyone and everything this time of year. Isn't it wonderful to be reminded of what makes this season special?
The Santa Speedo run is today. Started ten years ago by five drinking buddies, it now has raised close to half a million dollars for charity. All because a bunch of drunks lost a bar bet, and wore Santa Hats and beards as a disguise as they ran more than half-naked down the toniest street in Boston in 26 degree (-4C) weather. Aren't unexpected consequences wonderful?

[fpb.livejournal.com]

It is exactly because Christmas is eternal, that these temporary horrors are the more repulsive. When someone wrote Silent Night to celebrate the birth of the Christ Child, what excuse is there for Santa Baby?

[rfachir.livejournal.com]

Madonna gave it to the Very Secial Christmas project, which raised hundreds of millions for the Special Olympics? You can't convince me to develop taste now, my friend. I'm having too much fun.

[fpb.livejournal.com]

Madonna Ciccone being of course a fine moral example. I'll take Tiger Woods myself, thank you.